Confessions of a happy person

When I get a text/call from my boss and I automatically assume I'm in trouble. When I'm feeling super motivated to work but as soon as I get data I don't like, it's game over. When I need him to tell me I'm the prettiest/smartest/funniest girl he's ever liked.  When I already packed lunch but I'm feeling soo lazy I'd rather just buy.  When I weigh myself and think the scale must be broken. 

I have this evil twin.  She tells me things like, People are only nice to you because you're "pretty"... They don't really understand you... He's not going to care about you in the future... And she tells me that I need to protect myself. That you can't trust them because they're only going to hurt you.... Except being alone hurts too.

Year 1-2 YAY SCIENCE! Year 2-3 I suck at science Year 3-4 Science is sifting through the crap that is my data and trying to find something useful and that makes sense Beginning of Year 4- I've gotten a lot more science done than I thought To be continued...

I know it's hard to stay motivated That it feels hopeless and that there's no point in trying But you have to  start small to dream big And if only you could see what I see   You'd believe in you too. 

Sometimes I feel more comfortable being myself around strangers because if they judge me it's not like I'll ever see them again I think wisdom is looking back and realizing that you didn't know as much as you thought you did I usually have a lot more questions than answers I know life could be worse. That's what scares me. If I think life is hard now, how am I going to handle things like raising kids or my parents getting older...  I adore "weird" people The longer I do science the more I'm turning into a stereotypical scientist I like playing candy crush and doing puzzles because it empties out my mind Imagine failing at life about 80% of the time. It's called grad school.  I'm one of those kids that Michelle Obama was talking about in her speech- the ones who grew up with privilege I honestly don't understand why anyone would want to be president