Confessions of a happy person

I think playing "The Game" is a lot like playing BlackJack. When we win, it doesn't really matter whether we followed "the rules" or not.  But when we lose, it's either because we didn't play correctly  Or it's so we can tell ourselves, "well at least I followed the rules." 

I don't know if there was just something about this past summer in particular, or maybe because it's the first summer I've been single in a really long time and so I've been talking to my other single girl-friends a lot more... but basically I've been having very similar conversations with multiple people even though their details were different. So here's my two cents on the craziness that is dating and hopefully it helps to know that we're not the only ones who are super confused because no, you're not crazy or stupid. ---------------------------------- When we get involved with someone and then things don't work out, feeling rejected is kind of a mind f*ck.  Especially when we just know that we felt something. Maybe we shouldn't have made assumptions but seriously though, we all have better things to do than to hang around if they didn't act like they cared.  It feels like being lied to but not being able to prove it. Excep...

You may think I have it figured out But if I did, I wouldn't be writing this blog I write it for those days when I feel so alone and I get lost in all my thoughts and I'm trying to understand but I feel like I don't know who I am or what I'm even thinking or WHY  because I KNOW I shouldn't be doing this... And on the days when I do have it "under control" there's still this dark cloud in my heart and all   I can do is wait for it to pass So by putting it all out there and letting people see Then maybe we'd all feel less alone. You may think I have it figured out Because I write about the solution and not the problem But the problem is always on my mind. Why else would I focus so hard on the solution?

Let's have a discussion on mental illness. "We need to stop the stigma" "We need to be more supportive" "There are people that you know who are suffering from depression too" .........? I don't mean to downplay the efforts of mental illness advocates but personally I think these things are already pretty well established. And so there's no discussion because is anyone going to contradict those comments??? And while it's great when people or even celebrities suffering from mental illness come out and share their stories, it doesn't help with the fact that we all tend to treat it as a "it's them, not me" problem. We think, oh it doesn't affect me so how can I even help? And thus there's no discussion. But if we start having an internal discussion, we'd realize  "it" is affecting us every day and we just don't notice it until either we or someone we know has a breakdown. "It...

Disclaimer: I don't mean for these to apply only to heterosexual couples. And it could go the other way too. These are just based off my experience with fighting with my significant other.

I Am I am selfish, superficial, and heartless Am I a psychopath? I am unmotivated, pessimistic and hopeless Am I depressed? I have obsessed over my weight, eaten uncontrollably, and skipped eating a whole day Do I have an eating disorder? I am easily distracted, hyperactive, and unfocused Do I have ADD? Do I struggle with mental illness? I am... able to relate -------------------------- This poem is a bit of a prelude to the topic of Monday's post which is about what does "having a discussion about mental illness" even mean (??) and how I believe it's about  having a discussion with yourself first.

First Post 8/20/15 Acting as therapy and finding that the crazy in us is not so crazy 9/6/15 Loving "us"- a poem about the hard breakups 9/9/15 This one was for all the diet pill ads I see online

We often look at things in terms of black and white You're good or you're bad You're introverted or you're extroverted You're wrong or you're right But if you dig deeper, we often realize that things aren't as clear cut as we think. It's more of spectrum and constant balancing between the two opposite ends. Illness is the same way. (You're either sick or you're not... wait what?) I'm going to use cancer as an example. Cancer by definition is "the disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body." But if you ask anyone that studies cancer, they'll tell you that we all have these "abnormal cells" that could potentially develop into this disease. These abnormal cells are formed as a result of regular every day cellular functions (if you want to know more  click here  and here ). There's just no way to avoid it. The reason we don't all have cancer though is that our bod...

Those people do those things because they want to, not because a list told them to And they're probably STILL trying to figure it out If it was that easy, why isn't everyone doing those ten things? They tell you what "success/happiness/productiveness" looks like but not how to get there Success looks different for each person Everyone has their own set of talents You judge yourself when you don't meet those expectations You judge other people who don't meet those expectations Lists imply that once you "have it", you can cross it off Because 10 reasons

Loving "us" I love you but I don't love "us" So rather than being an "us" that I hate I want what's best for "you" and I want what's best for "me" In order to be an "us" that I love

Cuz you're not official until you're Facebook Official.  Not only that, but I do post and share other articles, pictures, cartoons, etc that I don't post on here.  https://www.facebook.com/confessionsofahappyperson As always, thanks for reading and all the support! :D 

"Acting is not about being someone different. It's finding the similarity in what is apparently different, then finding myself in there." - Meryl Streep I've been taking acting classes for over a year and from my experience (which isn't a lot but this is what I've been taught), acting is not about being a good liar and it's also not about pretending to be someone else. Which means I'm left with just being genuine and being myself. And while it takes a lot of work to get over the fact that people are watching and being able to connect with your emotions on the spot, the end result is really liberating. Because then (for me anyway) "acting" just becomes this process of believing that the situation is real and then having the freedom of being myself in that situation. This is the part that makes acting so therapeutic for me. Having the freedom of no right or wrong to just  being me. I get to be myself/as my character, with real emotions a...

I think part of the reason that it's so hard to talk about our issues is because a lot of times we don't understand why we're even having them. And so it's hard to explain to your friends and family that you're struggling with these things because even if they're supportive and ask you, well why do you feel that way, or what can I do to help... you don't know what to tell them. You can't logically explain it to yourself why you feel depressed. Which makes you feel even crazier and think that there's something wrong with you. "Something may not actually be fundamentally wrong, but you perceive it as so because the depression is tainting your thoughts down to your core." I recently talked to a good friend of mine about this blog and I invited her to share any thoughts that she might have. I've copied and pasted the email she sent me with two of her journal entries. I thought it was really brave of her to share this and I went and high...