Confessions of a happy person

It's been two weeks since I officially left my old lab and one week since I've been in Washington. In two more weeks I'll be starting my new post-doctoral position (meaning more research). People have been asking me if I'm excited about graduating and starting my new job.... I think I'm mostly just focusing on relaxing and recover from feeling burnt out as much as I can. No one can ever truly warn you about what adult-hood or graduate school is like, so I think these feelings are just a part of that. I can't really explain what it is I'm feeling, it's just that when I'm done with one thing, I'm on to the next thing on my never-ending checklist called life. I take breaks/vacations and I try to enjoy and stay in the moments, but you just know in the back of your mind that you have something big coming up soon that you have to plan for (new job, getting married, kids, etc). Even during this month off, I have to write a small proposal for w...

I still feel guilt over this blog My life is pretty good, how is it that I can still be miserable sometimes Or who am I to think I know any better about how to live life I just want to say that I get it And that depression is the evil twin that knows exactly where your weaknesses are and what to say to inflict the most pain Because it isn't the real you That the more your evil twin isolates you, the more he/she can make you believe their lies That there's nothing harder than fighting your own self Forget war enemies, this enemy is so powerful, it can convince you that you're better off ending your own life ..... I was in a bad mood for almost two weeks after the election All I want to say about it is I think it's healthy to feel things. And that everyone has different ways of dealing with it and doing what they think is best. This is part of being human. ..... I still think about this blog every day I just don't have this NEED to post any...

1. What unconditional love looks like 2. That all puppies who can barely hold in their excitement or freak out all the time will mature and become calm as they get older 3.  That you just need care and understanding when trying to fix any issue 4. That youth is exciting and new, while maturity is dependable and trustworthy. And that you can appreciate both 5. That even though they might not completely understand you... they are still there for you. And that's all you really need  Roxy getting comfy

Just an interesting observation I've had. But I still try to come up with posts. I just have a harder time thinking of one. And it makes sense because rather than thinking about life and being in my head all the time (which then becomes a blog post) , I'm busy  living and being present in my life .  But it's hard to tell yourself to stop thinking about things and forcing yourself to be present all the time. Or maybe I'm just really bad at distracting myself and staying focused when I'm busy. Even when I try to think about something else, I'll usually end up thinking about whatever it is that's bothering me again (and I try this about 100 times).  I think it's a mix of both too. That when you're present in your life, you're happier and that when you're happier, you're more present in your life...  I guess the healthy thing is to do the best you can. And to not judge yourself for failing. Because it always just takes som...